Twelve years

So here I am trying to get back into the Word and back into journaling... I often go through times when I feel like this is something I should be doing, but I think I push that feeling/knowledge aside because there are so many other things to do in a day. But I will take it one day at a time and see if I can allow myself the time to be with the Lord and hash out what is in my head.

There is so much going on every day in my life, mostly little daily life things. I love that. But it is crazy how busy the little things can make you feel. My in-laws came to visit a couple weeks ago. It was wonderful and fun having them here. And while they were here, I slept. I let some of the things I want to do go undone in leiu of sleep. I got at least 8 hours of sleep just about every night. And then I continued with that. The problem is that I really need to get up before the boys, just to be able to have some time of concentrated reading/prayer/writing without them needing me for things. And I really know that I need this time with my Lord and Savior. Period.

This morning, I was reading from Luke 8:43 "And a woman was there who had been subject to bleeding for twelve years, but no one could heal her. 44 She came up behind him and touched the edge of his cloak, and immediately her bleeding stopped."

And I am sitting here thinking, Twelve years??? How does someone go through 12 years of something like that? The reality is that people do it all the time. There are many people out there who have chronic illnesses or conditions that they deal with on a daily basis, with no ones cloak to reach for.

Lately I have some of my own stuff going on that made me say, "Lord, I wish you were here right now, so I could just touch the edge of your cloak." Don't you ever just wish that after so long of dealing with something that the solution would come, just like that, just like touching the edge of a King's cloak? My "stuff" is small potatoes compared to what some others go or have gone through. But I want healing just the same.

That desire for healing makes me long for the day when all our tears will be wiped away and there will be no more pain. I joke that I hope Jesus returns before my kids are teens (because the teenage years have me scared in advance, lol). But really, how awesome would it be to know that they would experience only heaven, with our Heavenly Father and the Son and none of the bad, hard stuff that comes with this life? I know the Lord has great plans for them... and they will handle whatever He brings to their lives, just like I have so far done. But no more tears? No more pain? In heaven with Christ forever? That would be a reality worth giving this life for or at least reaching for the edge of a King's cloak.