Where grace, truth and many other things meet

Ephesians 2:8  For it is by grace you have been saved, through faith--and this is not from yourselves, it is the gift of God-- 9  not by works, so that no one can boast.

2:10  For we are God's handiwork, created in Christ Jesus to do good works, which God prepared in advance for us to do.

So many intersecting and overlapping thoughts in my head these days.  Very little time to write them down.  Honestly, most days, I just lift them up in prayer form and hope that God will remind me of the lesson in the moments when I need it.

But yesterday, there was much wrestling in my heart about raising my boys and what grace will look like to them.  What should it look like?  Who is giving them that lesson?  Would reading their Bibles be enough on its own?  Or do they need a walking, talking, mama and daddy example of what the grace of Jesus looks like.

Of course, I think the last thing I mentioned is necessary.  That walking, talking, example of Jesus.  I hope to be that.  I know how far from perfect I am, but I do believe I can love these four little people with abandon and without condition.

The thing that makes it hard is that we want so much for our kids.  We want them to shine and feel good and make a difference.  We want them to be well-behaved and courteous and not to make mistakes.  We want them to be better than we were.

And we want all that to come along with harmony in our relationships.  But here's the hard thing:   I don't believe that to have harmony all the time is actually possible.  There will be discomfort and disappoint with each other and conflict.  But here's the good thing:  I believe this is where we really grow too.  This is where we learn and practice to handle our words with care and keep our tempers in check.  This is where we learn to express what we are feeling, without tearing anyone else down.  This is where we learn that what we are feeling is important, just because we are loved.  And this is where we learn that sometimes we are not going to agree with those who love us and that is okay; we can still love them and they will still love us.  These are lessons I am still (and probably always will be) learning.

Jesus still loves us, despite that we are constantly messing up.  But if we just read the part of scripture that says we are God's handiwork (which we are), we might forget that the handiwork still needs work.  We still have growth toward Jesus to accomplish, to look more like Him.

I want my kiddos to always know that I know how fallen and imperfect I really am.  I want to seek their forgiveness when I should, in order to teach them that they can seek mine (and others) when they should.  Most of all, I want them to know that just as the Lord deals with me, with love and compassion and forgiveness, so He will deal with them.  And when they go to Him, in search of these things, the handiwork that they are, will grow more to look like Him.  And how can a parent not fall more in love with that?